Stargate Atlantis: S7--Fearful Symmetry
by the morrighan
Summary: After a long long delay I have finally finished the Season 7 stories. There are five in all wherein we reach the conclusion of the war with the Fuglies and the newly organized Wraith. This is the first story. Thanks for reading.
1. Chapter 1

Stargate Atlantis: S7—Fearful Symmetry

Wrath.

Colonel John Sheppard felt it like a living thing, coursing along his body like a wave of heat. If blood could really boil it probably felt like this. Tension rode nearly every muscle in his body and as he slammed the palm of his hand down on the table all noise ceased. He wondered if it was the expression on his face, as all were staring at him. The cacophony of voices was stilled at last, arguments hanging unfinished in the air, discordant words swallowed by the abrupt silence he had engendered.

John almost allowed himself to smile, but he didn't. Instead he leaned slightly forward on the long mahogany conference table and eyed the startled audience staring back at him. "It's simple, really," he began. His voice was gruff, deep, brooking no opposition or comment. "We've nearly pinpointed the enemy's location. We hit them hard and we hit them fast before they can manoeuver their fleet further into the galaxy. We're bringing as many ships as we can to this fight and I expect our allies to do the same."

His glare ran along the odd assemblage of scientists, bureaucrats, Air Force colonels, off-world dignitaries, allies and assorted Atlantis personnel including a very disgruntled Doctor Rodney McKay. John turned towards a data screen. At his touch a display was illuminated; a real time display of the furthest reaches of the Pegasus Galaxy. A grouping of red dots represented the enemy fleet. They were like red globs of blood amid the scattered stars and planets.

"Within two weeks we will have decrypted their communications adequately enough so that we can intercept and interpret them, giving us the tactical advantage. We will converge upon them here and here…" He pressed a button and the screen came to life as two sets of blue dots began to surround the red ones in a classic pincer move. "And end this threat once and for all."

With a wave of his hand the screen went dark. He turned back to his audience, gaze raking across expressions ranging from anxiety to fear to speculation and anger. "It's simple, really," he repeated. "You're either with us, or against us. You decide. Now."

There was a flurry of protest when Richard Woolsey cleared his throat and moved to his feet. His fingers slid to smooth down his tie, but he wasn't wearing a tie or a suit so his fingers slid along the gray confines of his Atlantis uniform instead. "I think what Colonel Sheppard is saying is that we need all of our allies involved to defeat this threat to the entire galaxy."

"I said what I meant to say," John corrected. His tone bordered on insubordination. Mr. Woolsey was a civilian and nominally in charge of this expedition but John wasn't worried about any military repercussions. Besides, it was John who had saved the city, evacuated it and kept it submerged until the worst of the danger had passed. Now that the city was afloat and populated once more Woolsey was back in command. Except that both men knew that the city and John had a very special connection now, a connection that went past authority and into genetic compatibility that not even others with the ATA gene had.

"What about the Wraith? Are they not your allies as well?"

John's green gaze moved to the speaker, a striking tall woman with curling auburn hair. She wore a tight, low-cut leather outfit and her lips were forming a supercilious sneer that John knew all too well. Larrin was the leader of a group called the Travelers. They were essentially nomads living on ships in space and had helped Atlantis in the past. Having lost their one and only Ancient vessel, however, they were none too keen to aid them now. "Yes, they are, until this threat is eliminated."

"And why aren't they here with us?" Larrin persisted. Her posture was hostile but her gaze nearly devoured the military commander of Atlantis. He was clad entirely in black. Scruff shadowed his handsome face and his wayward brown hair appeared more tousled than usual. His full, perfect lips were forming a scowl and Larrin recalled the taste and feel of those lips on hers during their erratic flirtation years ago.

"I will be meeting with them in a more neutral location."

"You're certain the enemy will be at that location in two weeks?"

John's gaze swung to the questioner. It was a man, hair cut short to match his finely trimmed beard. His gray military outfit marked him as a Genii. Recently they had developed the technology for space travel and were loath to risk their new ships on any venture. In the past they had proven to be somewhat unreliable allies, but beggars couldn't be choosers and John needed as many ships as he could get at his disposal. "Yes. We will have their exact route pinpointed by that time. We have a few listening posts out there, undetectable to the enemy."

"And by then we will have successfully cracked the language barrier and be able to eavesdrop on their subspace chatter, and to translate it." At John's frown Rodney shrugged and glanced round the room. "Just saying…"

"How many ships are at your disposal, and do they have the firepower to stand against these aliens and their fleet?" Ladon Radim was nothing if not persistent. Although valuing his tentative alliance with Atlantis a rivalry would always exist, as well as some distrust.

"We've got enough to hold them off but not enough to ensure victory and some have firepower sufficient to match theirs," Colonel Abraham Ellis answered before John could. "I can't get into specifics at this stage." The truth was that without Ancient ships and only a few Asgard ones the situation was dire indeed.

"You really expect us to risk our ships on this fool's errand in an alliance with the Wraith?"

John glowered, anger flooding him but his voice was quiet, calm. "Either fight with us, or die alone. We're done here." He stalked around the table.

"Colonel! What Colonel Sheppard means is that we value your cooperation and aid against this enemy," Richard began to temporize, trying to head off more arguing and ill-feeling. "As you all know this new alien threat is dire. They have already obliterated several worlds, killing thousands of humans and if we don't stop their incursion into this galaxy many, many more will die. It's true we are outnumbered and outgunned, but I believe we can defeat them. We can defeat them only if we stand together, and yes, that does include the Wraith," he continued, raising a hand to forestall any objections. "The enemy of our enemy and all of that. So please, await our signal and meet us at the rendezvous point in two weeks."

The note of dismissal was unmistakable. Chairs scraped against the floor as everyone moved to their feet, muttering amongst themselves. Rodney stepped round to where John was standing at the back of the room, staring at a star chart. "Well, that went well," he commented.

John grunted in response.

Rodney shook his head and eyed the chart as well, listening to the various sounds of departure amid Richard's conciliatory tones. "You know…we might be up against them by ourselves."

"I know."

"John, a word."

Both men turned at the female voice. They exchanged a glance. Rodney sighed. "Why do you always get the beautiful alien?" he muttered, causing John to briefly smile. With a shake of his head the physicist made his way towards Richard who was still ushering guests out of the room.

"What is it?" John asked.

Larrin smiled at him, stepping closer, but a frown marred her brow as her charms appeared to have no effect on him at all. She rested her hands on her hips, as if to accentuate her figure. "I don't like being kept in the dark. This alliance with the Wraith…if they don't show there's no chance, is there?"

"They'll show."

"What makes you so certain?"

"They have a stake in this too. We all do, and the sooner you realize that the sooner you will give me all the ships that you can."

She tilted her head, as if sizing him up as her gaze met his. "Is that so? Last time things didn't work out so well, Sheppard, if you remember?"

"I remember. Things are different now."

"Different? How so?" He was silent, unreadable. A man etched in stone, all in black. "Damn it, Sheppard, I need more than—"

"That's all you're gonna get. You either meet us at the rendezvous point or you don't. Take it back to your people and convince them."

"We—" She touched his arm but he drew away, scowling.

"We'll be in touch," he curtly noted over his shoulder, dismissing her.

"Sheppard, a word." Abraham glanced at Larrin in passing before returning to the conference room. He waited until the doors had silently closed, giving them privacy. "You and I both know that we don't have near enough firepower to take out a fleet of enemy ships, let alone one or two. The IOA knows it as well and that is why I have only been authorized to join you with one Asgard ship, the _Aegis_. You and I both know that these so-called allies will only muster up about half of what we need."

"You and I seem to know a lot," John quipped, but anger threaded his tone. "Sir," he added as an afterthought, because Abraham did outrank him. "We don't have a choice. If we don't head them off now they will overrun this galaxy, and who's to say if they'll stop here or try for the Milky Way. In any event the Wraith do have the firepower to even the odds and they will join us."

Abraham frowned, gaze narrowing. "Let me make myself perfectly clear. I know you've seen this threat up close. I know you've lost men to it, and have had other personnel injured by it. I respect both your experience and your judgment in this. Just don't let any emotional considerations cloud your command decisions."

"I won't," John tersely assured. The lights flickered in the room, as if reflecting his inner ire.

"I will hold you to that. As much as I may agree with your assessment of the enemy you and I both know the IOA won't commit to this fight any more than it already has. Unless you've got a few tricks up your sleeve this is going to be a very close engagement."

John smiled. "Oh, I've got a few tricks up my sleeve, don't worry." He ignored Rodney's cough as the physicist added his own non-verbal commentary.

"Doctor McKay, you have something to add?"

"Oh, you're going to suddenly talk to me now?" Rodney asked. His acerbic tone was in full force.

"Rodney—" John tried to temporize, but the physicist had never gotten along with Ellis after the colonel had disparaged him years ago. Rodney had never forgotten it, even if Ellis had.

"I have plenty to add, but I certainly wouldn't want to waste your valuable time with any scientific solutions, now would I?"

Abraham frowned. "Doctor, if you have a solution I would like to hear it."

"And I would like a lot of things but unfortunately we can't always get what we want."

"Doctor McKay! If you have something solid to offer and are not just aggrandizing I want to hear it now!"

"Don't worry. Rodney's got plenty of tricks up his sleeve," John offered, trying again to deflect the antagonism but to no avail.

Rodney glared at the other man. "I don't report to you. As far as I am concerned you are just another lackey in a chain of lackeys sent here to nitpick and bombast your way around while the scientists do all of the real work!" Rodney glanced at John. "I'll be in the lab."

John nodded. Before Abraham could reply Rodney had opened the doors and stalked out of the conference room, clearly irritated. John eyed his superior officer. "We should be ready to move in two weeks, give or take, once I get more intel and an exact position."

"How can you work with—"

"He's a genius, believe it or not, so just go with it."

Abraham swallowed his anger and the several curse words floating in his mind. The passage of time has certainly not softened the physicist's temper or ego. "And what about the Wraith?" Abraham asked, dismissing Rodney for the moment.

"I will contact them as soon as I have the pertinent information."

"What I don't understand, Sheppard, is why you don't just fly the city into battle? Atlantis would be more than a match for any alien ship, no matter how powerful."

"I won't do that. I've already explained my reasons." John crossed his arms in front of his chest, intractable.

"So you did, and I am still not clear on them. As you know this city is in actuality a fully functioning ship, and the power she could bring to the fight could tip the scales for us."

"The power she would require would drain every last ZPM that we have. Besides, I won't risk the city, not after having just restored her. Atlantis stays where she is and that's final."

"I still think you are neglecting a powerful resource and—"

"I am not. I am preserving one."

"Fine. I will keep the _Aegis_ in orbit until the attack. Those tricks of yours had better be damn good ones."

"Oh, they are, believe me. They are."

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John stepped into the control room. After Abraham had left John had remained in the conference room, calming himself and shoving the anger back down into a dark place. The lights flickered wildly, as if the city empathized. John moved to a console and eyed the various screens.

"Well, that could have gone better," Richard remarked, joining him.

John shrugged. "And it could have gone worse. Sorry…not a diplomat."

"I figured as much." The men briefly shared a smile. "Look, John, I know that time is of the essence but you've only been back from Earth a few days. Why not take a few days off to—"

"No. As you said, time is of the essence and I'm fine." John looked up to see everyone staring at him, expressions ranging from concern to curiosity. He particularly found the gaze of Ann Teldy unsettling, the flow of compassion from her blue eyes disturbing, especially given their romantic history. John swallowed. "I'm fine." He restored his gaze to the screen. "Bring up the latest schematic," he stated.

Chuck Campbell nodded and wordlessly typed, filling the screen with views of ships and lists of numbers and logistics.

John scanned the speculative readings. He nodded and stepped round to leave the room. The soft touch of a hand on his arm halted him and he paused in the hallway. "Ann?"

"John. Oh John…I just heard. About the car accident," she clarified at his blank look. "How awful for you!" Ann engulfed her former lover in a hug.

John did not return it. He awkwardly stood, stomach churning but his resolve never weakening.

Ann drew back, blue eyes full of worry, beautiful face drawn in concern. "Are you okay? I know, it's a stupid question but you know what I mean. It…it must have been terrible, and then for you to come back here and…"

"Yeah. I'm fine. Excuse me." John tried to extricate himself.

"John, don't. Not with me. You know you can always talk to me. Even about this." Ann kept hold of his arm, searching his gaze, searching his handsome face for any sign of relenting. "Despite what happened between us, I know you were, you were happy with her and I certainly wouldn't wish what happened on you or her or anyone."

"Thanks. I gotta go."

John freed his arm and strode down the hall. He fled the concern. He fled the sympathy.

He fled.


	2. Chapter 2

Stargate Atlantis: S7—Fearful Symmetry2

"Tricks? Tricks? Am I some charlatan now, some magician who can just wave a magic wand and presto change fix everything and create a weapon out of mid-air?"

"Aren't you?" John asked with a smirk as he sat in the physics lab. Upon entering Rodney had begun a litany of outrage and complaints, which oddly felt normal. The two men were alone and John allowed himself to relax, if only a little.

"Of course not!" Rodney flared, pacing around the room like a caged animal. "I've told you and told you and told you that it can't be done! You always want the impossible, and yes, brilliant as I am even I can't do the impossible!"

"Maybe I should have asked Zelenka," John slyly noted.

"Oh ha ha very funny! Maybe you should have!" Deflated Rodney slumped into a chair next to his friend. He sighed, running a hand through his thinning hair.

John took a generous swig of beer from a bottle. He licked his lips, setting the bottle down amidst a maelstrom of papers and files and data pads. "You can do it, Rodney. You know how damn important this is and I know you relish the challenge. You'll do it. If only to shove it in Ellis's face."

"There is that." Rodney took a sip of his own beer. "It's a dangerous game you're playing, John." Rodney gestured with the beer bottle, sloshing the alcohol around in it like a tidal wave. "Too many questions are going to be asked, if not by Ellis than by the IOA or even Woolsey. I know you don't want all of your eggs in one basket but you have too many baskets spread out across the galaxy, and I can't be in charge of one of them."

John took the bottle from his friend's grasp before the precious fluid spilled out of it. He set the bottle aside, shaking his head. "I've got everything under control. You just get your part done and the rest will follow."

"You realize that if I can't get this ship up and running we're doomed. There, I said it. Without the _Tria _we don't have a chance against those Fugly ships. You've seen the schematics! You've seen the energy readings! It took a modified Penning trap to destroy one of those ships and cripple the other one! And that was their own weapon! Even my brilliant mind can't conceive how to make another one, not quite like that anyway! You do realize that we are seriously outgunned here!"

"So you're saying you can't do it?"

"I've been saying that for weeks!" Rodney exclaimed, but he sighed and shook his head. "That is to say even with the additional ZPMs I'm not sure if I can get that wreck back in working order, let alone get the weapons online and the hyperdrive working. It's a long shot."

"It's all we got, Rodney. You can do it. It's our ace in the hole and you know that. She's in a stable orbit now and so far the repairs are holding."

"So far." Rodney took a sip of beer. "I don't like all of this deception," Rodney admitted, voice lowering as if the walls could hear him. "I understand the necessity, yes, but I still don't like it."

"Nor do I…but the stakes are too high and we can't risk it. I…I can't risk it." John eyed his beer bottle, as myriad memories tangled.

"John…don't push yourself too hard," Rodney warned. He reached out to touch John's hand, but refrained, as the military commander seemed lost in himself, in his own thoughts. "John?"

John merely shrugged. He was jolted out of his musing when a voice came over the intercom. "Colonel Sheppard to the control room. Colonel Sheppard to the control room."

"What's that about?" Rodney asked.

"I have no idea. Keep working at it." John pointed at the pile on the desk as he moved to his feet. With a sigh he downed the last of the beer and left the empty bottle behind. He made his way to the control room. The Stargate below was active, chevrons spinning.

"Colonel Sheppard, incoming. Authenticating now." Chuck Campbell listened as he typed on the computer. "Authentication code Zulu Alpha Tango?"

"Echo Base. Open the Iris and put me on a secure channel," John ordered, tapping his earpiece and moving to a console. The Iris dropped and the KAWOOSH filled the Gate room, receding to a glimmering pool in the Stargate. He glanced over to see a squad of marines at the ready. With a wave of his hand he dismissed them. He spotted Ronon Dex heading for him, ignoring the gesture.

"What's happening?" Richard asked, joining them. He eyed the Stargate for a moment.

"Incoming message from Echo Base," John said, eyes on the Stargate as well. "This is Sheppard. Report."

"Colonel Sheppard? Sending updated intel on the fleet's current position. We've intercepted several radio transmissions and are working on a translation." The man's voice was interspersed with static, but his words were comprehensible.

"Acknowledged. Receiving transmission." John pointed to a computer as Chuck typed. "Firewall that." John glanced at the data stream, watching as it became deciphered into words and information. "Status?"

"Transmission complete," Amelia Banks-Dex, reported. Her auburn brows formed a frown as she transferred the data stream to another console. "It looks like the fleet is on the move, sir, but not in any significant numbers. At least not yet." She glanced at her husband. Ronon was still looking at John, unmovable.

"Any visitors?" John asked the disembodied voice.

"Negative, colonel. So far we are completely undetected. Security protocols are in place," assured the disembodied voice.

"How's the twin?" John asked, referring to the second planet locked in orbit with the first one. Rodney had theorized that the gravitational pull of the larger planet would eventually pull the smaller planet into a spectacular collision with it, but he didn't know when, only that it would happen. Already orbital decay was evident.

"Stable for now."

"Let me talk to Doctor Green." John glanced round the control room. Technicians were busily engaged in tackling the new information. Richard was reading over a man's shoulder. Ronon was standing near, gaze on Sheppard, face unreadable. "Secure channel number two." John hit a button and turned away to eye the shimmering Stargate. He tapped his earpiece. "Green?"

Richard moved to eye the data streaming along. "Do we have an exact location now? And from that can we determine a trajectory? This could move up our timetable considerably? John? John, are you listening to me?"

A smile curved John's lips as he was listening to the private transmission in his ear. He nodded, grunted and interrupted the flow of words in his ear. "Just get me that translation ASAP and I'll come to you. Sheppard out."

He gestured and the event horizon winked out of existence. John turned to view Richard. "I want this up on the board now. If that fleet is moving quickly we need to do the same."

"And the translation?"

"Green's got the team working on it. We should know soon. More importantly we need to move up the timetable, as you said. We'll need to contact our allies and set up the rendezvous point. ETA is in about a week to get there and coordinate. I'll need to contact the Wraith from a secure location and set up a meeting out there," he vaguely gestured, "so our position isn't compromised."

"All right. I'll get the ball rolling. What about the—"

"Rodney will get it working in no time, trust me," John assured. He turned and nearly knocked into Ronon. "What?" he snapped. "If you're wondering about the teams going I was considering asking you, even though you'll just be stuck on a ship. But if they hit the hull like they did on the faux Daedalus they might board and that would complicate things."

"John…"

"Crap," John muttered, seeing the sympathy in his friend's eyes. "I'm fine, okay?"

"I just wanted to say…I'm sorry."

"All right, you said it. Now can we move on?"

"John! Surely you can't be that heartless!" Carson Beckett joined them, blue eyes aghast at the military commander's seemingly cavalier attitude. "I know that everyone grieves in their own way but you must allow your friends to aid you. Och, man, the loss you've suffered is one that I would wish on no one. We've all lost a dear friend in the loss of her," the doctor continued, Scottish brogue becoming more pronounced.

John scowled. "Really? You really want me to believe that, Carson? You all want me to believe that? After what we all went through? After what she went through, what she endured in my stead and how you all turned against her? All of you!" His glare cut like ice as he viewed the people staring at him. His so-called friends who had belittled her condition and had even participated in her torture, however unknowingly.

"John—"

"No! I'm fine. I said I'm fine. Now leave it."

With a final glare John stalked out of the control room.

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_They rush down the steps of the courthouse, dazzled, laughing, caught in the moment. A wind whips the jacket of John's dress blues and the white lace of Moira's skirt. They pause at the sidewalk, both out of breath and Moira fumbles with the roses she is holding. Red petals flutter and swirl around them, riding the breeze._

_Moira laughs and steps away from John to snatch the fallen flowers from the road._

_The car comes screeching around the corner and right for her, speeding too close to the curb._

_Too close._

John woke with a start, nearly jolted out of the bed. He stared at the darkness, heart thudding wildly in his chest. He took several deep breaths to calm himself as his fingers grasped tightly at the blankets tangled around him. The city was silent, soothing. The quiet susurration of the waves below was comforting, familiar.

John swallowed and fought free of the blankets. He swung his legs off the bed and planted his bare feet onto the floor. The solidity and coldness centered him. He rubbed his eyes, glancing at the clock before he sighed and dropped his hands to his lap.

He sighed. He stood, stalked to the window. He stared at the dark waves below. City lights sparkled sporadically on the ebb and flow of the deep waters. He could imagine the cold; the unceasing cold, chill as the grave.

He shut his eyes against the motion beneath him; against the lights sparkling among the city's windows and turrets.

He shut his eyes against the darkness outside.

The darkness within remained, however.

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Space was vast.

It was a never-ending sea of darkness, lit sporadically by distant stars and distant planets. Across mind-numbing distances there was only an endless void of darkness and nothingness wherein ships traveled to and fro, forever seeking sustenance. Even farther out a crab nebula glinted. Gaseous waves of red and blue seemed to creep across the darkness of space like some monster spreading out its limbs.

Connecting the planets was a network of Stargates, created by the Ancients centuries ago. For most of the galaxy they were the only link between worlds and civilizations.

But not for all. Some had spaceships capable of traveling the terrifying distances between planets and stars. These were the masters of the galaxy, and would continue to be so once dominance had been established. Once the Wraith regained control after eliminating their rivals, one by one.

The view from the Hive Ship was enormous, all-encompassing. It was a view that would humble many. It even made the large ship seem small. It was an island lost amid an ocean of darkness.

The creature which had once been Elizabeth Weir or at least parts of her consciousness turned from the impressive viewport and let her gaze glide along the control panels of her command center. Lights blinked and data scrolled along screens in the language of the Wraith. It was easily understood, for she was more Wraith now than human, more Wraith than Replicator. She was a strange amalgamation of all three which rendered her more powerful than any other Wraith queen.

She turned her head to gaze upon her servant quietly waiting. His head was bowed, but she knew he was not as acquiescent as the others were. Instead of angering her she found this amusing, and useful. "Report," she said. Her voice was a gravelly mockery of Elizabeth Weir's. A stray dark curl bounced across one pale cheek.

Todd raised his head and shrugged. It was a very human gesture. "Nothing yet, my queen. So far John Sheppard has neglected to contact us. Shall we contact him?"

"No. He will contact us when the time is right. Then we will crush this new threat once and for all." She moved to her throne and sat. Black sleeves spread along the chair's arms, melting into the darkness of the room.

"He is withholding information from us."

"Of course he is. As we are from him. I would expect nothing less."

"And then?"

Elizabeth smiled, revealing the many teeth of a Wraith between her red, red lips. "And then? And then we will conquer the only remaining threat to us. We will conquer Atlantis." She paused, savoring her next words. "We will conquer John Sheppard."

Todd smiled.


	3. Chapter 3

Stargate Atlantis—S7 Fearful Symmetry3

John ran a hand through his dark brown hair, further disordering it. He rubbed his scruffy chin as he eyed the schematics on his data pad. He licked his lips, mind working furiously. "Okay then. We can figure out where they are, and where they are going. Once I have those translations we will know for certain, but for now I am fairly confident of their course."

"Fairly?"

John looked up to see Richard eying him. The leader of Atlantis appeared concerned. Furrows lined his brow. The lights in the conference room glinted off his bald head and his glasses as he glanced down to the data screen. "Yeah."

"I'm afraid we are going to need more than that, colonel. Ellis wants exact intel."

"This is as good as it gets, for now. We'll be close enough." John shut the data pad. "With any luck our Wraith friends will have a more accurate assessment." He snatched a pen from the table and began to tap, tap, tap it against the mahogany wood.

Richard took a seat near the military commander. "What aren't you telling me?"

John debated. The pen's constant tapping was a staccato that was about to get on Richard's nerves when John set the pen aside. "Contingency plans."

"Come again?"

"Contingency plans. In case things go south."

"Oh. Yes, we've discussed that, John. At length. Evacuation of all Atlantis personnel except for key people to keep the city running. Perhaps even the evacuation of Atlantis or rather its removal from this planet. Let's pray it does not come to that."

"It could. Come to that." John began tapping the pen again, oblivious to Richard's irritation. "I know you can make the hard decisions, if it comes to that. If things do go south don't hesitate to do whatever you must to protect our people and Atlantis. Don't come after us."

Richard nodded. "I won't."

John nodded. "I've already decided about the teams accompanying me on this op." He opened the data pad and typed, then pushed it towards Richard. "You might notice some omissions."

Richard eyed the lists of names and stations. "Yes. I expected you'd keep Delta stationed here, yes." He quirked a brow, met John's gaze. "Are you sure about this? I mean you certainly could use Rodney on the—"

"No. I need him to stay here and protect the city, should it come down to that. No one knows the intricacies of this city better than him. Just don't tell him I said that." The two men shared a brief smile.

"John? May I have a word?"

Both men looked over to see Teyla Emmagan in the doorway. The Athosian was clad in a gray Atlantis uniform and her demeanor was serious. Sympathy shone in her eyes.

"I was just leaving." Richard stood as John took back the data pad. "If those are your decisions, colonel, I won't naysay them. How soon will you be leaving to meet with the Wraith?"

"In a day or so." John waited. Richard smiled at Teyla as he exited the room. Teyla nodded and took the seat that the expedition's leader had just vacated.

"John…I—" she began, reaching out to touch his hand but John withdrew, pulling back from the table.

"I wanted to talk to you, Teyla, before the general word got out. As much as I would like to have you on this mission I think it would be best if you stayed here in the city. In case things go badly I would like to have you here to protect the city and its inhabitants, as well as organize any evacs should it come to that."

"If that is your decision, John, I will abide with it."

"Really?" Now it was John's turn to raise a brow. "No arguing? No protestations of how you would be more useful on the ship in space, or how I shouldn't let Torren affect my command decisions?"

Teyla smiled. "No. Now that we are back in the city we intend to remain. Although I have been learning much about a ship's systems I am also learning more about Atlantis and its ways. I agree I would be of more use here."

"Wow….that's a first," he commented wryly. "Okay then. Now I just need to convince McKay he would be more useful here, and convince Ronon he would be more useful on the ship."

"I am certain you will have no trouble with Ronon. However, with Rodney you may encounter fierce resistance."

"Yeah…I expect that."

"John…I…I only just heard," she attempted again, scooting closer and touching his arm. "I am so sorry. If there's anything I can do…"

"There's nothing." John drew away from the touch, from the sympathy. He glanced round the room, steeling himself.

"John, you need to talk about it. I was told it was a car accident?"

Abruptly John moved to his feet. He snatched his data pad off the table and stepped round to view a screen full of data. His back was to her and she could see the tension in his broad shoulders. "Yeah." His voice was gruff, quiet. He stared at the data, hating himself but convinced that this was the only course of action. "Came out of nowhere, speeding. Hit the curb where we were."

_Red petals scattering on the breeze along the road. _

_The screech of tires and the stink of burning rubber filling the air. _

_Moira's gasp of shock. _

_John's realization that he would be a newlywed and a widower in the same day._

"John? John?" Teyla had moved to him and was gently shaking his arm.

John blinked, met her gaze. "I—"

"I am sorry!" Teyla engulfed him in a hug. "I should not have pressed you to talk about it. Only know that I am here when you feel the need to talk about it."

"You're here now. You weren't here earlier though. You didn't think I could save this city, did you? That's why you abandoned it." The accusation flew from his lips in a defensive maneuver as he stepped out of the hug.

Teyla blinked. "I had to think of Torren first, John. You know this. I had to consider his future above everyone else's, even the city's. Do you still harbor resentment because of that?"

"No…I…sorry…" John shrugged, awkward now. He couldn't blame her for her decision, and all was well now. It still rankled, however much he wished to deny it.

"John…if you ever need to talk about—" Teyla offered again, catching his arm.

"Thanks." John grimaced, feeling terrible. He disengaged from her grasp and shrugged. "I've got work to do. But…um…thanks." Awkwardly he stepped round her and exited the room. His long legs expedited his escape.

Teyla stared after him.

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Carson finished lining up the various pharmaceuticals. He produced a key from the pocket of his white lab coat and locked the cabinet. "There. More than enough supplies, thank you, major. We were running perilously low." He secreted the key back into his pocket and turned to view the array of boxes and crates still littering the medical bay.

"That should be everything." Alison Porter checked a list on the clipboard she held. She shoved strands of her dark brown hair behind one ear and smiled at the Scottish doctor. "I have to say it is good to be back in Atlantis."

Carson smiled at her. "Aye, it's good to have you back."

"Carson…what was it like? I mean being in the city while it was submerged."

Carson's smile faded. He glanced round the medical bay, at the rows of gurneys. All of the beds were empty, including the one that had once held restraints. He felt a shudder at the memory and quickly suppressed it. "It was…odd," he finally decided on the word. "It was rather like being in an aquarium. It was very cold as we had to limit our power usage. It was very quiet. You could almost feel the pressure of the waves on the walls."

Alison moved to him and touched his arm. "I didn't mean to bring up any bad memories. I was just curious."

He met her gaze, shaking himself out of the guilt he still felt. The things he had done in the name of medicine were horrifying. And even though he had been under the influence and control of the city's split AI he could not deny the guilt and remorse. "It's no bother, love. It was an unusual experience, but one that I would rather not repeat."

"These new aliens…did you ever see one?"

"Oh aye! I even performed a complete autopsy. The body's in cold storage if you want to see it. Fascinating. A new species of human, well not a new species but an old one. Homo erectus. A species which evolved out here and on a planet that was very different from Earth, or so we theorize…theorized." Carson's enthusiasm was cut short.

"I would like to see it. And you've been doing the genetic analysis?"

"Aye, in order to better understand them."

"Another species of human…and you've been able to tackle the language barrier?"

"Slowly but surely. Moira had the initial contact and the…" Carson moved to sit in a chair, suddenly overcome. "Alison….I've done such terrible things." He hid his face in his hands, hunching over in the chair. "Things that I am ashamed to tell you about. It was me, but not me. It was some insane entity that had control of me, but I still…I did those things. I did those terrible things to Moira, all in the name of science to try to cure her…and now, now she's gone. She's gone, Alison! And poor John…I cannot imagine the anguish he's going through."

Alison moved to the doctor. Gently she pulled his hands from his face and shook her head, moving to her knees in front of him. "No, Carson. You were trying to help her, at least initially, and whatever that thing, that entity made you do it wasn't your fault! You mustn't think like that! From what the report said you couldn't be held accountable for your—"

"I am! I am accountable! Good God, woman, I practically tortured her!" Carson's loud voice caused many to stop, to stare in shock at the doctor they all knew and trusted.

"You weren't yourself, and even Colonel Sheppard said as much in the report," Alison soothed. She moved to her feet. "The best thing we can do is to give our people every advantage that we can over these aliens. Now let's get to work."

Carson nodded. He blinked back unshed tears and stood. "Aye…you're right. You're right." He cast a glance at that last bed, and forced the memories aside.

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"I tried."

Everyone eyed Ronon as they sat in the cafeteria, all round one table as if locked in some conspiracy. Ronon shrugged and began to eat his dinner, ignoring the stares.

"And?" Amelia prompted, frowning. "Ronon!" She elbowed him.

"What? I said I tried. He doesn't want to talk about it."

"He needs to talk about it," Ann insisted, jabbing the air with her empty fork for emphasis. "We are about to face our most dangerous enemy, and if John is in any way distracted by what happened on Earth, or worse is out for revenge or retribution he could compromise the mission."

"Nothing wrong with revenge. Besides," Ronon added to his wife's glare, "the Fuglies had nothing to do with what happened on Earth."

"True, but they did harm her, irreparably. You remember. You all do. The hallucinations. The episodes of near hysteria," Amelia confided, voice low.

"But did she not recover?" Teyla asked. She was gently bouncing her son on her lap. Torren was not interested in the conversation as he sucked on a toy.

"Yes, somewhat, but it could color his command decisions, especially now." Ann sighed, setting down her fork. "Rodney needs to talk to him. Where is he?" She looked round but for once the physicist was not to be found in the cafeteria at meal time.

"He's locked in a lab. Some kind of top-secret research that even I can't access," Radek Zelenka replied with a sigh. He shook his head. "Whatever it is he won't talk about it. He only says that it's vital for this mission."

"I think we should back off, for now. Give him some privacy," Ronon suggested, but the women eying him clearly disagreed.

"I'll try to talk to him tonight. Maybe I can get him to open up a bit," Ann suggested. As John's former girlfriend she felt the best qualified to understanding how the man thought and felt, or so she tried to convince herself.

"I advise you to tread lightly," Amelia said. "When it comes to Moira he was always a little…overprotective. Zealously so, at times."

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John reclined on his bed. His arms were folded under his head and he was on top of the blankets, still fully clothed in a black fleece top and black pants. His room was engulfed by darkness. It was a darkness so complete not even the city lights at the window could fully penetrate it. He stared up at the ceiling, brooding, letting memories wash over him and fill his mind.

_Laughter fills the air. Moira is shaking her head, trying to half-heartedly pull away but John has a firm, gentle hold on her hands. "John? Are you serious? Here? Now?"_

_John smiles and tugs her closer to him. "Yeah, why not? Here. Now. As long as we're on Earth let's get hitched, properly. Unless you wanted a big wedding?_

"_What? No, it's not that! It's just…are you sure?" Moira stares at him, serious, stern. Her brown eyes full of love for him but also concern which only makes him more determined to have her as his. "I mean…with my, um, problems. Who knows if there will be more manifestations of my illness, or if another symptom may occur or if—"_

"_Don't care." He kisses her, letting his lips convey what his awkward attempts at romance cannot. "I want to marry you, Moy, here and now. Do you want to marry me?"_

"_Yes, of course! I love you, John! It's just…"_

A knocking at the door interrupted his reverie. He scowled, ignoring it, keeping hold of the image of Moira in his mind but as the knocking continued, followed by a voice she slipped away from him, as insubstantial as a ghost.

"John? John, are you in there? I know you are in there! John!"

John cursed and sat. He stood and stalked to the door. With an angry wave of his hand he opened it and glared. "What?" he snapped.

Rodney ignored his friend's mood and smiled. "It's done."

"It's….what? Done? It's done? Wait, what's done? The hyperdrive?"

"No, dinner is done and everyone is wondering where the hell you were! Yes, the hyperdrive is done!" Rodney informed, irritated.

"Oh. Great. Thanks, Rodney."

"Thanks, Rodney? Do you have any idea how difficult it was to repair that part of the ship? Plus we had to integrate the updates that the Asgard provided and re-route several power systems!"

"Like I said, great," John said, but his smile was genuine.

"When you do want to head out?"

"In a few days. I need to shore up things here and then contact the Wraith for our meeting."

"Fine. We can head out in a few days. That will give me time to calibrate the Ancient systems and give her a fine-tuning. We've been trying to integrate the beaming technology but have hit a few walls and I need to try to re-route the—"

"No."

"No? You don't want me to give her a—"

"No, I do, but you're not coming with me."

"What? Of course I am coming with you! You will need me—"

"I need you here, Rodney, to take care of Atlantis! Especially if things don't go well out there."

"Things won't go well out there if I am not with you! You think you can command the ship and power the Drones all at once, do you? And what about the other systems? Oh sure, you'll have a crew at your disposal but what good will that do you if they don't know a thing about the newly integrated power systems and the—"

"You're not coming with me and that's final!"

"It is not final!" Rodney stared at John suddenly shut the door. "John? John! It is not final! John! We aren't done discussing this, not by a long shot!"


	4. Chapter 4

Stargate Atlantis—S7 Fearful Symmetry 4

John had just settled onto the bed once more, trying to relax when another knock interrupted. He cursed and shouted. "My decision is final, Rodney! Go away!"

"John?" asked a very feminine voice.

"Shit." John moved to his feet and crossed to the door. His stomach twisted and he glanced round, as if guilty of something. There was no one there to accuse him. Darkness enfolded him. He waved his hand over the door and began to talk as it opened. "Look, I'm fine, okay? I just need some sleep."

Ann stared at the military commander, frowning in concern. He appeared unkempt, upset although his green eyes were alert and wary. "You are not fine, John. Everyone is worried about you. You weren't at dinner tonight."

"I prefer to eat alone."

"Since when? John, that's not healthy, especially not after…" She left the rest unsaid. He was a hard man to read sometimes and the situation was nothing less than awkward, given their history. After all, John had dumped her to be with Moira. He had chosen an awkward scientist over an efficient soldier, which still baffled Ann even now.

John let his gaze rake over his former girlfriend. Dark blonde hair normally in a bun was loose and fell to her shoulders. Instead of her Atlantis BDUs she wore a soft blue t-shirt and dark brown pants. John met her blue eyes and shrugged. "I've got a lot on my mind at the moment. As long as everyone does their job we can win this thing."

"You know that's not what I am talking about. John!" she scolded, stopping him before he could shut the door. "You have to talk about it!"

"I don't have to talk about anything!" He calmed his voice, his tone. "I'm fine. Let's just get through this latest disaster and see how it ends, okay? I won't be compromising my job."

Ann's eyes widened. "How did you—"

"Don't you think I know? Don't you think I can hear the whispers and see the stares? I know how things are now. I know how I can't really trust anyone, only a few."

"Don't you think you are being a little paranoid, like…oh…sorry! I didn't mean—" Ann realized in horror she had just hit a nerve.

"You mean like her? Like Moira? She had every right to be, and so do I!" John would have slammed the door, but Atlantis doors did not slam. Instead the door whooshed close quietly. He swore and stalked round the room, angry and guilty and wanting nothing more than to hit something, to hit anything.

Finally he sank down onto the bed and hid his face in his hands. He knew this was going to be hard. But he hadn't realized just how difficult it would be.

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Rodney wanted to pound his fist onto the desk. Instead he settled for slapping his hand on the arm of the chair in Richard's office. It wasn't as satisfying but at least it didn't hurt. "What do you mean I have to stay here?"

Richard allowed himself a small smile. The physicist sounded like a child who was told he had to stay behind and not go on a field trip with the rest of the class. "Exactly that. John and I agreed that you would be more valuable here in the city than on that ship."

"You two agreed? Well, I don't agree! I won't let John go up alone against those aliens!"

"He won't be alone. He will have a full complement on the ship with him, plus the _Aegis_, plus our allies. Plus the Wraith, if you could call them allies."

"You know what I mean! He will need me aboard the _Tria_!"

"No, doctor. We need you here. I'm afraid that's my final decision."

"As flattering as that is, and yes, I do know more about the city and its systems than anyone I still think I would be much more useful on the ship! We're going against an enemy the likes of which we have never faced before! I've seen them up close! I've seen the capability of their ships and their weaponry! I've intercepted their radio transmissions and even developed a prototype of their Penning trap to throw back at them! I've—"

"Yes, doctor, you've done all of that and more," Richard agreed, trying to interrupt the physicist before he launched into another rant, "and you have helped the mission immeasurably. You are more needed here. If things don't go well we will need you here to protect the city. Do you understand now?"

"Of course I understand! Of course I…oh." Rodney considered, sinking back into the plush confines of the chair. "I just…"

"I know."

The two men sat in silent commiseration.

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"Working late?"

John sighed and looked up from the data pad. He was ensconced in the conference room, going over the mission specs for the hundredth time and studying all of the information that they had on the Fugly ships and capabilities. He nodded, fingers stilled on the keyboard.

Teyla smiled and entered. She crossed the shadows, taking a seat near her friend. "Torren was fussy but finally went back to sleep. Unfortunately I cannot sleep now."

"Kids, huh?" John eyed the data screen. The sleek design of the Fugly ship met his eyes. It was compact, ending in a long projectile. It bore the curious marking like they all did; the same marking that was on the aliens' armor as well. John wondered if it was a logo or a tribal thing or a societal thing or just art. Feeling Teyla's eyes on him he finally met her gaze. "I'm fine."

Teyla studied him, tilting her head slightly. "Yes, I can see you are fine. John…if you—"

"Incoming wormhole!"

John leapt to his feet at the summons. He glanced at Teyla and strode to the control room. Teyla followed quickly. The Stargate was active, chevrons flowing as Atlantis was being dialed. Lights flooded the Gate room. "What is it?" he asked.

Chuck shrugged. "Awaiting an IDC, sir."

"Raise the Shield," John ordered. He stepped to the glass and eyed the Stargate below him. The KAWOOSH exploded then snapped into a shimmering pool. A second later the Shield frosted over the event horizon, preventing anyone or anything from entering Atlantis. A team of marines took up defensive positions, just in case.

"Receiving IDC…sir, it's Echo Base."

"Lower the Shield! Give me a secure line now!" John rushed to the console and tapped his earpiece. He touched the console and it purred to life, giving him access to every system. "This is Sheppard."

"What's happening?" Richard ran into the control room, staring round.

"Colonel Sheppard, this is Collins. Sending new coordinates. We have movement of the fleet," announced the crackling voice of the man in charge of Echo Base.

"Receiving," John said, glancing over as Chuck quickly secured the transmission. "Status?"

"Fleet's on the move, colonel. Rapid…expansion…planning a vector to… planetfall…we've almost transl…river…" Collins's voice was breaking up with static.

"Repeat that! Collins! Damn it!" John glared at the console. Lights grew brighter as if the city was sharing his anger. "Can you boost the signal?"

"Negative, sir. There's too much interference, like always." Chuck shrugged apologetically. "Shall I send a MALP or—"

"Negative. Shut it down. Translate those coordinates now." John looked at Richard. "Looks like my meeting with Todd just got moved up." He began to leave.

"John? Are you going to contact them from-"

"Not here." John paused, turning to view the expedition leader. "I will contact them from a more secure location, nowhere near Atlantis. In fact…" He debated, debated. "Chuck, get ready to dial up the Alpha site. I'll access the systems and contact them from there for our rendezvous."

"Are you certain about this, colonel? I mean I know that we need the Wraith as our allies in this…but all of this subterfuge makes me…nervous."

John shrugged. "It has to be this way. We know we need them, but we also know we can't trust them. Especially now."

A knowing look passed between the two men.

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Todd strolled into the command chamber and bowed. "My queen, we have contact. John Sheppard is—"

"Requesting a meeting?" Elizabeth finished for him. Her back was to him as she stood staring out the viewport at the vastness of space. There was a long stretch of silence. Only the beeping of the computers broke the heaviness. It seemed to take an interminable time until finally she spoke. "Accept."

"As you wish."

She turned to Todd, gaze thoughtful. Greenish light played across her face, making her even more ghoulish. "You will go to a neutral planet and negotiate this alliance. Find out exactly what he has at his disposal and do not reveal our true numbers. Promise him half of what he needs, only half."

"Yes, my queen." Todd bowed and exited. He felt a sense of relief upon being free of her scrutiny as much as he would hate to admit it. He missed the days when he was head of the alliance and bowed to no one. Much had changed in the intervening years, however, and with the entire Wraith species united they would be unstoppable

The galaxy was theirs for the taking.

Once these new aliens were eliminated, that is.

They were a curious enemy. Supposedly human, a different species of human according to the Lantean scientists, and yet the Wraith could not feed upon them. They were unintelligible, communicating in a language that was impossible to decipher. Their weaponry and ships were impressive, and they wore armor that was difficult to destroy. They bore cybernetic implants but were mostly organic beings. They were highly advanced, yet their hyperdrive systems were not as complex as any in the Pegasus galaxy.

In any event they were a threat and needed to be eliminated.

Todd stepped to the control console and tapped a button. "Send the coordinates and we shall meet you there, John Sheppard."

"Sending coordinates," rasped the voice of John Sheppard. Lights played across the screen as a series of intermittent data bursts infiltrated the computer. "One ship only and just you, pal. Got it?"

Todd smiled. He had always found this particular human both fascinating and amusing. The man's annoyance was audible. "Of course, John Sheppard. You are not calling from Atlantis," he observed, as the signal was proving difficult to trace. The signal bounced around in a most peculiar manner.

"I'll be waiting for you at those coordinates. Sheppard out."

Abruptly the transmission ended. Todd frowned, eying the data as it scrolled and located the planet upon which the meeting would take place. It was on the outer edges of the galaxy, somewhat near the enemy fleet but far enough away to be safe. At least for now.

"Access all information on this planetary system," Todd ordered. There was something nagging him, something familiar about this location but he couldn't place it, at least not yet. His long fingernail tapped the console as he waited for the information to be displayed.

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John shut down the transmission and shoved his hands into his pockets. It was always cold on the Alpha site, but where he was headed next it was even colder. He walked over to the waiting marines. There was always a security team on the Alpha site, just in case. John eyed the men. "Keep monitoring for any traffic. If worse comes to worse we'll be sending people to you."

"Yes, sir."

"With any luck you'll be recalled to Atlantis soon, after all of this. Stay sharp."

John exited the Quonset hut and strolled down a pleasant pathway to the DHD. Sporadic warmth kissed his skin as the sun shone brightly in the chilly air. The planet was mostly uninhabited but viable. Trees towered in the distance on either side of him.

He reached the DHD and dialed Atlantis, brooding on the mission ahead of him. It would be dangerous, which was nothing new to him, but this time it was for all the marbles and there could be no mistakes. There could be no failures. He knew he would lose some men, and probably some ships. He just hoped that he had enough to once and for all end this conflict and send the Fuglies back to their own galaxy.

He glanced round at the green trees, the green grass softly swaying in the breeze. It reminded him of that day, that day that played in his mind repeatedly until his job allowed him to shut it off if only for a little while.

"_Moira!" John shouts as he lunges forward, grabbing her and flinging them both onto the hard sidewalk. The car screeches so close the heat from the tires scorches his skin. Tires race so close that John can make out every tread, every line of rubber as it burns the road. The engine rumbling is a roar in his ears and the rush of wind shrieks like a banshee in warning._

_But it is the awful, awful knock of a head onto the hard, hard sidewalk that is the worst of all._

_The worst of all._

_The worst._


	5. Chapter 5

Stargate Atlantis: S7—Fearful Symmetry5

John stood in the control room, arms folded in front of his chest. He eyed the consoles as data scrolled along the screens. As if sensing his displeasure the screens flickered momentarily. "That's it?" he asked, voice curt.

"That's all we can access. I'm sorry, colonel. The distances are just too great." Radek Zelenka shrugged and adjusted his glasses before returning his fingers to a computer's keyboard. "At best we can approximate their position but we can't verify the exact locations from here. Nor can we verify their exact numbers. If they are using cloaking technology this will be even more difficult."

"That's why we have Echo Base, right?" Richard joined them and viewed the screens. "Is there a problem?"

"No. I just want to be absolutely sure of my intel before I inform Todd." John rubbed his chin for a moment, gaze locked on the screens. "The problem is we have no idea how these guys think, you know? We can reasonably guess their intentions, obviously, but what makes them tick? Even their intentions are not that clear considering their actions. We initially believed they were after their Penning trap, and they were…but they also had another agenda."

"You mean invading our galaxy?" Richard asked.

"Yeah. I don't think they have the resources for that, but they have sent an advance force. At the same time they haven't attempted any forms of communication and have destroyed a few worlds. If we only knew what makes them tick, how they think we could be a step ahead of them."

"Along those lines we do have several scientists addressing those concerns, colonel, as well as tackling the whole language barrier. Of course none of them were as connected to them as Doctor O'Meara was. Oh! Sorry!"

John waved his hand in the air, dismissing the sudden embarrassment of the expedition leader. He kept his gaze glued to the screens as he thoughtfully rubbed his scruffy chin. "Their way of thinking must be similar to ours, since they are human, well, a species of human. Yet they are very alien to us."

John recalled the aliens. They were bulky, bald and grey-skinned. They had implants on their heads that they used for communication as well as additional sensory input. They wore armor. They all bore a strange marking, an insignia that was also on their ships. They were incredibly difficult to kill. It took several shots just to bring one down.

"You tried to communicate with them before, didn't you? I recall it in your report," Richard noted carefully. He felt he was crossing a minefield and was not sure how far to go. The reticence of the military commander when it came to personal considerations was almost legendary.

"Yeah, we did. Moira had created an interface to communicate with the aliens and it worked to a point." John fell silent, lost in himself for a moment as memories filled his mind. He looked up suddenly to see everyone staring at him. The silence was so absolute you could have heard a pin drop. John frowned, dropping his hand to his side. "Anyway, that's what Echo Base is working on now. Doesn't help us understand their mindset, though."

"It's a start, though, a very good start," Richard acknowledged. He adjusted his glasses. He felt he should say something, anything, but no words came to him.

John met his gaze. "It's all we got for now. I need to go over a few things before departure."

"Are you sure you want to deal with Todd alone? I mean you could always take Ronon for back-up," Richard offered.

John shook his head. "No need. I'll be fine."

"Are you sure? Considering their leader…" Richard left the rest unsaid. Only a handful knew about the Wraith Queen's identity. It was safer to keep that horrible fact a secret for now.

"She won't be there. Todd will handle this for her."

"And if Todd double-crosses us?"

"He won't. Right now they need us as much as we need them. I think we'll advance from there and check out the situation before the rest of the fleet arrives. That way we can coordinate before the battle and keep them in our sights."

"All right, colonel. I will defer to you on military matters. Won't you need to clear this through Colonel Ellis?"

"No. I mean I'll contact you once the terms are set and you can inform Ellis." He flashed the startled expedition leader a quick smile before striding out of the control room.

Leaving Woolsey to handle Ellis for a change.

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"M6H-987. At least that was the Lantean designation for the planet."

"Significance?"

Todd turned to view his queen as she sat upon her throne. She was almost invisible, black within black, a dark hole of a command center with a dark queen at its heart. A queen darker than any pure Wraith queen had been. Todd replied, "It was the home of the Attero device. It was destroyed several years ago. What remains there now is anyone's guess."

Elizabeth nodded, eying the data scrolling along the screens. "The Stargate destroyer. A most powerful device created by the Ancients and then utilized by the rogue Asgard. The lab was obliterated?"

"Yes, most of it. Only after I lost two Hive ships and everyone aboard," Todd added. His lingering anger over the incident was palpable. The loss of two ships and all Wraith on board was both tragic and mortifying. It took years to grow a Hive ship and it took years to assemble a competent crew. The set-back had cost Todd both position and respect.

"You blame John for this still," she observed.

He nodded. "And since the planet has no Stargate we will have to take a Cruiser to get there." Todd sounded annoyed.

Elizabeth smiled. "John is being cautious. I don't think he quite trusts us, do you?" She arched a delicate brow. Not expecting an answer she turned to view the vast array of stars. "No matter. Anything else?"

"No, my queen. The planet is of no use to us strategically. There is no human population inhabiting it and the last of the Asgard are long gone. It is an ice world, completely blanketed by snow. It is cold and inhospitable."

"Then you had better take a sweater."

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John zipped his black fleece shirt. He grabbed his coat and looked round the sparse furnishings of his room. So much had happened in the past months; great upheavals in both his professional and personal life. His room remained the same, seemingly untouched by the calamities and triumphs. His things were still here, still in the same places they had been for a few years.

Nothing really had changed in this room.

And yet everything had.

The lights flickered then warmed to an amber gleam, as if the city was trying to convey sympathy, or emotion. John pursed his lips and stalked round his room. With a muttered curse he left and strode down the hallways.

He entered an empty room and stood, surveying the contents. Nothing had been touched. Nothing had been moved. At any moment he almost expected Moira to enter and demand to know what he was doing in her room. He smiled at the thought, but the smile quickly faded.

He stepped to the bed and sat upon it. Comfort enfolded him and he stroked the blankets under him. "Ah baby…I really hate this." He stared round, not expecting an answer. The room's lights flickered. At least the city was acknowledging him. Curious warmth wafted to him and he realized that the heating had been activated. The slight breeze ruffled his hair, much like a woman's fingers would have.

If he closed his eyes he could almost imagine it, almost pretend it was Moira's gentle caress that was consoling him and soothing him. He could almost hear her voice in his ear, saying it would be all right, John, it would be all right, John….

"_It will be all right, John," Moira says softly, her fingers running through his hair as they lay entwined together on the hotel bed. Her gaze is serious as she presses her naked body to his. "Are you sure you want to do this?"_

_John smiles up at her. He drinks in the love warming her brown eyes. Her long hair falls along them like a silken blanket and he reaches to tangle his fingers in the curling tresses. "I think it would be for the best, baby. For now."_

"_It won't be easy, John," she warns, still serious. "But if you think it's necessary…"_

"_It is."_

"_It will be all right, John. It will be all right, John."_

"It will be all right, John."

John jolted off the bed. He hadn't realized he had reclined and fallen asleep. He stared round. That voice had sounded real, outside of his head and not in it. He was alone, but he realized he really wasn't alone. The lights in the room were flickering, flickering as the city was trying to communicate with him.

John moved to his feet, alarmed that the AI once more was having an identity crisis. He couldn't afford to have the city go crazy now. Out of the corner of his eye he saw movement and whirled. For a split second he thought he had seen the image of a woman in a mirror. The blank, empty glass reflected his shocked face.

"No. Don't you do that again, damn it!" he scolded, feeling ridiculous but at the same time the lights flickered, then dimmed.

John sighed and rubbed his eyes. He snatched his coat off the floor and left the empty room.

XxX XxX XxX XxX XxX XxX XxX XxX XxX XxX XxX XxX XxX XxX XxX XxX XxX

He was upset. His emotions were tightly under control, but in unguarded moments they would surface. When he was alone they would reveal themselves; conflicting emotions that were incomprehensible.

He was angry. His fierce determination to protect was overwhelming and his determination to end the threat was admirable. Darker forces were at play, however. He didn't quite trust his colleagues, except for the physicist.

He was sad. There was moroseness in him that had not been there earlier. His mood had always been difficult to understand but this was more complicated.

He was hiding something. Human behavior was difficult to interpret, but the deception was there all the same. It could be felt in the way he joined with the city systems, as if only half of him were engaged when his full attention should be there.

Atlantis was both curious and jealous.


End file.
